Ladies, Set Your Phasers...

Stuff...Just Stuff...And Things

Post Apocalyptic Altair:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/SwTSznfyTyI/AAAAAAAADgs/eeScgGc-qt4/s1600/altair.jpg

Steampunk Wonder Woman:

http://cghub.com/files/Image/122001-123000/122129/281_max.jpg

OT Tron Hoodie-I WANT THIS:

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/Syr4_SIYO6I/AAAAAAAAFPM/JREIV_C_Fgg/s1600-h/tron.jpg

Survival Tracking Guide:

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJ5r9LZZ44XTuOF7xa9Jf6AuJSzOFQJsFgxWHWa_00kZyvMkmMSAiZjTvRRHVe9-l50Ir6WNfgShqY4nSlloHtknfpzyahzXlP1lz24JbGp8bd3P1Xlam7yChQXUpus725eORn7UmtSziO/s1600-h/survivaltrackingguidelb1.jpg

Chevacca Shouldnt Chew Gum:

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdhTjNPNZGs-4pAgl8GIo7RdOtOp76UaPwGWYO7pLZiZZvIPZdaNMJXhNLf7bXeyorh2DcvLMJuLx8HNfq9h6ZlyS8vwvvArJnuibXVhbdfTFljE7yupsPxWGoWSLF172u-qlF7zrz9_PP/s1600-h/131858.gif

Bad Avatar Costume YDIW:

https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgs96eU1o9C0Vq6kUhvvLg_NazEX5euULCAMuRYdQShyphenhyphenZKV4pC2DBuu0It8GwLXUrtV9n2emZdjTPz9_ays4xqVTvAMI13nzmXWAupYLt6E08Zhvup2chYwZtUD1YXvHaxlAZAGk53H7A/s1600/DSC_0712.JPG

Zombie Na'vi:

http://www.garygretsky.com/blog/wp-content/uploads/2010/11/pney_color_7_rev-copy.jpg

-Lee

More Pics!

Animal and Beaker as Wolverine and Cyclops:

The TRUE origins of the Black Eyed Peas:

Superhero Role Reversal...I guess:

Deadpool is a Killer, don't show sympathy here, just LAUGH:

A Zombie, Pirate, Ninja, Robot War...WHO will win?!:

Pics Are Always Fun!

Adorable Star Wars guys:

Adorable Doggie:

An Emo Horse:

An awesome pic of me from the 15th century...I rode eagles back then:

Hot Star Wars Nerd......FEMALE?!

Ok, so this may sound like the Loch Ness monster of tall tales, but girls actually can be nerds.....decent looking ones too. I know! It sounds like the biggest lie! But I swear to it, AND I have proof.

Now, to clarify, I've never met or seen one personally, but as soon as I do I'll be sure to kill you so my chances are better.

On YouTube, there is a woman named Jennifer Landa (which is also her channel name on YouTube btw) and her channel is all about Star Wars. I know - I had the same reaction.

Check her out in the video link below. She is actually pretty funny, and like I said, a hottie. So if you're a nerd and like pretty females......uh, HUMAN females, not Klingons or Na'vi (I'm guilty on that last one) or anything weird, then look up Jennifer Landa.

Here is an example of her content:

How to Speak Huttese!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JWVMzXq4ewg&feature=youtube_gdata_player

-Lee

TERRA NOVA - First Look Trailer

Terra Nova is basically Avatar and Jurassic Park mixed together. But you know what? It looks freaking cool! Check it out for yourself:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=X6aNEIZwPFc&feature=youtube_gdata_player

-Lee

Technical Difficulties

So I am having problems with my newest post for some gay reason, so in the meantime while I figure it out, here are a few things to keep you busy:

Stop Sentimental Vampires:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/S1dsYvXfniI/AAAAAAAAG40/8yTyWWokBFU/s1600-h/stop_sentimental_vampires_by_FernandoLucas.jpg

Zombeanuts:

http://2.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/S1aSWDadG4I/AAAAAAAAG2k/R1PZ8Jt1T7M/s1600-h/zombie.jpg

Chocolate Han Solo Carbonite:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/S1H9Y8QAYlI/AAAAAAAAGmM/KvgqO0yAgBg/s1600-h/solo.jpg

Awesome Art by Kenneth Rocafort, this guy is amazimgly good:

http://therocafortfiles.blogspot.com/

Thats all for now. Keep checking for updates soon.

-Lee

Some Stuff

I know I have posted a bunch of crap recently, but I have more now so just deal with it. You're probably just sitting on the toilet anyway, updating your Facebook or Twitter, so one more second of looking at my blog won't kill you. It may actually help everything come out better if you laugh hard enough.

Anyways, I apologize for the format of the links to the pictures below. My phone is weird when I try to post pictures from it to my blog, so Robert's your uncle, Fanny's your aunt, and that's that. Just read on:

Did you know Moses was the first waterbender, like on the "Avatar: The Last Airbender" cartoon show? Not that crap-lousy movie. Check it out:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/TDnISr5N_-I/AAAAAAAAWL8/BBgL2IC7rLE/s1600/Moses.jpg

Speaking of "Avatar," alot of people made this joke when James Cameron's "Avatar" came out, but I'd never really laughed until I saw this one. The "Twilight" themed one was eye sodomy. But I promise this one is funny. It's called Smurvatar:

http://3.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/TCk6XY_SmdI/AAAAAAAAVLE/ERVBb7YJd-E/s1600/zoom.gif

I really wish this were real. To have a "Lost: the Animated Series" show would be cool. Just look at the picture and let your mind get............lost:

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/S9MXXRX-xXI/AAAAAAAAO-8/QkJ2crIAv5c/s1600/4548207324_173b1dcce4_o.jpg

Ok, I love "Left 4 Dead," and I also love "The Wizard of Oz," so for someone to mash them up, to me, is brilliant. It fits the formula (three dudes and a girl, all with different backgrounds + zombies = pure fun!), and it mixes two genres that would otherwise never meet. With that said, I give you "L4D of Oz":

http://1.bp.blogspot.com/_XdP6Lp2ceqY/S8PffOAbaRI/AAAAAAAANj4/wHrPDT_KG-c/s1600/CHOW%23196_agnostes.jpg

Alrighty then. That's it for now. I have another crapload of stuff to drop, but for now I'll leave it at this. Oh, plus I have some stuff to post up here too. Ha! That was another bathroom joke. I wonder how many people read the first one and went "Haha..........wait, how'd he know that....??"

Ahhhh..............................cause I do it too. Peace out homies.

-Lee

The Dragon Master Dual

If his training video wasn't enough to get you hot, check out his dual with this pig-tailed.......guy. I'm sure this was a battle for the ages. We are ever so blessed that a camera was rolling whilst these legendary foes finally settled the score. But who will win? Let's watch!!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=vOs-wyQszR8&feature=youtube_gdata_player

I guess the asian chick won :/

Huh. I guess THAT result makes more sense than one of the two chuckle heads in the foreground winning; as they swing at the air, never landing a punch........except for when Pig-Tail Guy KINDA stuck that one kick sorta....or was it just a leg flail? Who knows.

I'm sure it all looked and felt incredibly awesome in thier own minds, which is all that really matters in the end...to them. To us it's that there was a camera there to let us glimpse a level of dorkiness we never actually want to be any part of, but will always be willing to make fun of.

-Lee

The Dragon Twister

Skip to 5:10 to have your mind BLOWN, or watch the full 6:34 for complete euphoric sweetness:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zbLTepYm3z8&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Im not sure how this kid IS'NT an international sex symbol and all-around bamf, but just because he's not doesn't mean that he's a failure.

No, inside everyone of us there is a small portion that truly wants to be as awesome as him, mullet and all (0:46).

And despite his clumsy swordplay, his comfortableness with the fact that his mom is taping him, and confidence in his ability (useful or not; you decide), he does manage to make you laugh, with or at him. And at the end of it all, he made you watch his total domination of the "Dragon Twister" move all over that baseball diamond/bleacher area, which I'm sure took him years to perfect and, obviously, master.

You go, Dragon Master. Get down with your bad self.

P.S. Before anyone asks, NO, this is not me. My mullet is waaaay sweeter than his.

-Lee "The Dragon Master"

Demotes

Ronald Jenkees - Throwing Fire

I dare you to listen to this guys song and try to NOT bob your head to its beat. Just try:

Check out this video on YouTube:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0O2aH4XLbto&feature=youtube_gdata_player

-Lee

The Strangest Thing You'll See All Day

I really hope you think about this picture hours later and go "what the crap WAS that!?" Cause seriously, what the crap is happening here?!

We have a large, hairy, middle-eastern strongman who is very average looking (with a rather dashing moustache, btw), HOLDING a pocket-sized, blonde-haired, infantile, middle-eastern, sorta-strongman who is wearing Mickey Mouse diapers...? I just dont know. He also has a sweet moustache.

Things like this just freak me out and give me nightmares. Just imagine seeing THAT guy in your dreams........I mean, PICK ONE; they are both equally creepy!

Anyway, like I said, my goal is for you to have this image with you all day, cause just TRY and forget this one. Its next to impossible. Besides, it would break little Habib's heart if you do. Just look at that face; its one only his mother (pictured, on the right) could love.

Peace out.

And By The Way...

Tron Samurai

This is by far the COOLEST thing I have seen all day:

Wonder Woman

New Name, New Rants, Same Everything Else

If you have'nt noticed by now, I have changed the name of this blog from being Dangerous, to Nerdstalgic. It's literally the same in every way, just now I have a catchy (almost copywrite infringing) name and URL.

If you are having problems viewing the site, just send me an email at

DangerousLeeHarris@GMail.com

That is all for now. I look forward to hearing comments/lawsuit issues if they arise.

Peace!

NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NO! NOOOOOOOO!!!!!

Oh GOD, the end is near.

This is a total perversion of...of...of everything! I hope whoever made this only did it as a joke, because if it was made by some STUPID girl who decided to mash-up her two favorite love stories then she needs to be lobotomized in a large way. But even then, I don't want this to even exist.

I realize I haven't filled you in on what is so disturbing to me, so here it is:

Break Out the Wooden Stakes - I'm Going On A Rampage!

This hurts me. It makes me physically ill. It's just wrong on so many levels. I love Avatar as it is; I don't need some sparkly, douched-up, sissified, watered-down, tweeny, bull-crap, horror abortion like Twi-gay ruining it completely.

I realize this is all just for two movies that are just that - movies. But, as I see it, other people and myself would have the same reaction if someone tried to mash-up Avatar with The Godfather. They are movies about two completely different things; I don't want them to be mixed. And if I would have an adverse reaction to THAT mash-up, then you understand and hopefully agree with my reaction to THIS smash-up.

To mix ANYTHING with Twilight, even for a humorous reason, is like drinking a whole bottle of laxatives - you're only going to end up with alot of extra crap you never needed and only wanted to get rid of in the first place.

I Hate Twilight

Also this:

I Really Hope You Get This Reference

Just This:

Chew-bike-ah

Super Dump!!!

Well, I really have nothing important to blog about today, so I'll just give you some eye candy this time.

First off, I know SOME people think that thier "bean-bag couches" are the bees knees, but I think I have found something that trumps the bean-bag couch:

Giant Cat Couch

I love the giant cat couch (its so bad), its hilarious. Can you imagine what people would think when they would first see it? They'd be like "holy sh - oh its just a couch..." It'd be so worth it.

Most everyone is familiar with the account in the Bible where Moses splits the Red Sea so the Israelites can pass through. Well, now YOU can be God! Check it out:

Moses Jacket

I'm not sure if its sacrelige what I just said, but it fit the joke and you got what I meant, I think. Y'know, the whole..hand of....God.....thing.....where he...split the....sea...so his people...........................could...................shut the heck up.

So when its cold and snowy outside, sometimes I like to pretend I'm on Hoth hanging out with Han and Chewie....well, I mean I USED to do that as a kid, not as a grown adult........not recently anyway....um, anyways, now it will be easier for OTHER nerds who do this (not me) to be "in character," thanks to this invention from Adidas:

Wookie Coat

I never wanted to be Chewie as a kid, but seeing as how I almost always got stuck as him when there were already three other kids who had taken Han, Luke, and Obi-Wan, this wouldve been handy. 

Have you ever felt like a second-string character in an epic space opera, such as Star Wars? Have you ever dreamed of seeing the supporting cast do something heroic, saving the galaxy, if you will? Well look no further than this:

Jek Porkins Saves the Galaxy

Talk about SOME PIG, Charlotte. That guy needed a specially designed X-Wing just so his ham-hocks fould fit. Was there no basic training in the Rebel Army? I mean, sure, as a pilot you dont have to be built like Arnold to fly a ship. But seriously, any military on Earth would tell this guy to drop a buck fifty or two before signing up. Even though he got roasted at the Death Star, its nice to see him get some recognition here, even if it IS posthumously. 

I love these. Theyre so hilarious, I cant even say much about them, they pretty much speak for themselves. Take a look:

All My Friends Are Dead

Epic battles only come around every so often, thats why theyre called Epic Battles. Some are so cool you can sum them up in just three words:

Zombie Versus Shark

This is also just a cool idea. Someone has taken Star Wars and set it back in the 40's, right in the middle of World War II. Take a look at these custom action figures:

If Star Wars Happened During WWII

Thats all for now. I really encourage you to take a look-see at the site SuperPunch.blogspot.com. Its got some really awesome art, stories, nerd stuff, and pretty much anything else that you SHOULD either like, or at least know about, as it may save your life one day. 

Quick question: are you ready for zombies???

Dismissed.

Wonder Woman Redeux

I feel kinda ripped off. Why?

Well obvioisly my last entry was about the new Wonder Woman actress/costume. Upon looking around the interwebs I found out about the actress who was originally going to play her.

Her name is Tanit Phoenix. Her name sounds epic; lets see if she is:

Tanit Phoenix

Hmm. Not bad. Not bad at all. Much better looking than Adrianne Palicki. I found aonther picture. You decide if she looks better:

Tanit Phoenix

Wonder Woman Statuette

Oh, definitely. She just has the LOOK, yknow? Its the eyes. Her eyes look like the statuette's. She looks more like Wonder Woman than Linda Carter!

Instead though, they went with this, which looks like (insert a joke involving Rainbow Bright, unicorns, mushrooms, and a pleather factory, cause I cant think of one). This is a hi-res version of the pic I posted last entry:

Adrienne Palicki Looking Like She Knows She Looks Dumb

Its irritating. But hey, speaking of last entry, I have decided to stop posting actual pictures on here. I guess when you use a mobile device to look at the pictures it takes you to a Picassa web album, which is junk and makes the images all pixeled and cruddy looking. So, for all of my thousands of readers, this is for you.

Anywho, I still have low expectations for the new Winder Woman show. It in no way interests me...except for the hottness factor an stuff. Its basically the same reason I want to see Sucker Punch. Im a dude; nuff said.

I have one last image. Its another official picture from the new Wonder Woman show. Enjoy:

New Costume Picture!



-Lee

Official Wonder Woman Costume

I am not a Wonder Woman fan. But when the reboot show comes on later this year I will definitely watch.

That having been said, I would like to say that I am not complaining about anything here. I am just giving a critical reaction.




Its crap. Honestly, this looks like something you'd see at a Halloween party. "Oh Jamie is Wonder Woman this year! Holy Lasso of Justice, she is fiiiiiiiiiiiiiiine!" I'm blown away by the lack of effort put into this costume. Its like they asked a group of 12 year old boys to design it. Ick, I can just imagine the shouts of "add more leather!" now.

I personally am a fan of what they did on Smallville:




Again though, Im not complaining. Im a guy, and guys like good looking women in sezzy clothing. Adrianne Palicki is pretty hot, so to see her as the timeless beauty that is Wonder Woman is, to be honest, any 11+ year old boys dream.

And, in defense of this costume, it is way better than the original:




Just silly. And what's the deal with her waist? It looks like its blowing up a set of leg-shaped baloons. The 70's **shakes head**

The site io9.com had this to say about the picture:

"This first costume photo comes via Entertainment Weekly. According to the site and various script reports, NBC's version of Wonder Woman is supposed to be a 'serious, non-campy take on the DC Comics character.' And yet in the pilot, she complains about her bra size, flies an invisible plane and has a magic lasso. Oh, and she looks like this. This is not looking promising, to say the least."

It seems that the strong, empowering role-model that is the amazonian princess warrior Diana/Wonder Woman has been reduced to a wide-eyed and bushy-tailed, twenty-something valley girl who is "looking for her place in this open-ended world." Which is sad because of everything her character stands for and used to represent.

But, like Captain America, Wonder Woman is a hokey super heroine at best. I really dont think this show will last, just based upon that. They might as well just seal its fate early and cast Summer Glau now. At least that way there would be no confusion when the axe comes down.

But I may be wrong. If they try to appeal to women with this show, there will be alot of happy husbands. Think about it: a show about a woman in tight leather beating and tying up OTHER hot women in tight leather that your wife is OK with you watching and wants to watch WITH you; the ratings may be through the roof. This may end up becoming a huge success.

But dont count on it. You can ususally smell crap no matter what its dressed up as, and this image has that distinct odor. Look for Wonder Woman on NBC later this fall.

-Dangerous


-Lee

Uh, Wow

Yeah, um, I'm just gonna throw this out there: Spiderman is gonna rock.


This is a costume win (see previous rant about Captain America). Clearly this movie will be awesome because...well...it just WILL be, ok?!
Honestly, everything about The Amazing Spiderman (official title) just makes my spider sense tingle...and itch, but thats a different story (tequila is a heck of a drink).
So yeah, this season of superhero movies is gonna be entertaining. Hopefully it won't be a repeat of back in the early 2000's when a sudden influx of superhero movies hit the scene and everyone was like "Aw snap son! X-Men gonna be taught!" But then it came out and everyone was like "Um, what happened? Hey, whats THAT?! Aw zef yo! Fantastic Four gonna rock the hizzy!" but then it came out and (despite having the amazing Jessica Alba as pure eye-candy) everyone was still like "Pfft, I'm sick of supers. Lets go see The Notebook." And thats the story of how my brother lost his Man Card. He'll tell you it happened a different way, but HE DOESN'T HAVE A BLOG...........well, actually he does. Crap. But I still have it and I wont give it back!!!
So Spidey is gonna be amazing (see what I did there? :D) and I couldn't be happier. Spiderman is my personal favorite superhero btw.
What'd suck is if both Green Lantern and Captain America were awesome beyond compare and X-Men First Class and Amazing Spiderman failed hard. I'd just give up on life. Or just be a man and say "hey I like seeing stuff blow up," and realize its just a movie. That makes me sound like the "Devils Nerdy Advocate." Haha.
Whatev.
Look for giant cobwebs to appear in New York sometime around spring of 2012. I for one cannot wait.

-Lee

X-Men: First Class...Better Than Captain America? What Isn't?

So X-Men: First Class has an official trailer. Check it out:

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ofXqQ-nEcPc&feature=youtube_gdata_player

Pretty tight, huh? Much better than Crap-tain 'Murrca. Even though I like the idea of a superhero without super powers (e.g. Batman) such as El Captain, I still like to have my eyes pleasured by seeing someone act like Chris Brown and toss an SR-71 Blackbird around like its Rihanna...I hope you get that joke.

Plus it'd be cool to have Magneto's ability, am I right? I'd be so lazy. I'd sit in a metal chair with wheels and never get up. I'd still work like normal, but I would also do the superhero thing as well. For extra cash I'd make metal sculptures using only the fillings from the peoples teeth I'd save. I'd be so hated....but also so loved. Aaaaaaannd that joke is dead. Moving on.

Anyway, I think this is a trailer done RIGHT, seeing as how the past few have been poopy. Yeah thats right; I said poopy.

Even though X-Men movies have a shaky history among fans, I really think the mistakes of those past films have been accounted for and overcome with this new one. I mean, for Pete's sake, they put Emma Frost in this one - and Kevin Bacon! I know, right?! It's like they read my mind when they cast this...

.................?

Wait a second............Kevin Bacon? What the...?

Wait, wait, wait; its ok people. I think I know whats going on here. Kevin Bacon realized he hasn't been in a movie since Hollow Man (terrible, btw), so to keep his street cred intact AND to keep all the people who play "6 Degrees of Kevin Bacon" happy, which is like everybody, he decided to be in a more current movie. Way to go KB!

Seriously though, and being %100 honest - KB hasn't been in a good movie since.............Tremors. That's just my opinion, but this is MY blog, so I'm allowed my poinion. But that having been said, I'm not entirely sure how much he can bring to this movie, being that he's...well, he's Kevin Bacon. Does it make sense to you?

Even so, I have high hopes for this one, but if I'm going to be fair and platonic with my pre-viewing judgments, I need to say that this movie may LOOK pretty and have a solid story, but we still have yet to see any serious acting from it yet. Thats what will make or break X-Men: First Class, in my opinion (MY blog).

That is all for now. In the words of the great Stan Lee, "Excelsior..............wait...where am I...?"

-Lee

Captain Wuss

Ah......you know what always feels good? Being RIGHT. Just excuse me for a sec while I bask in my prediction come true.........

Ok, so as most now know, and for those who have small, underdeveloped brains and do NOT know, Captain America is going to blow. Hard. If you did not see the trailer for it during the superbowl then I implore you to do so before reading further. I'll wait.....

You back so soon? So, are you feeling okay? If not, don't worry; what you are experiencing is just a sensory overload of craptasticity (pretty sure I made up that word just now...) which normally would render the average viewer unconcious for at least a few minutes, but you have managed to stave off a blackout, which is remarkable seeing as how 30 seconds of your life have been sucked out of your eyes.

That was kind of dramatic, I apologize.

But I WILL NOT apologize for this: Captain America looks like total crap! The trailer only confirmed this further. Let's take the blue pill and hope we make it out of this dream ok:

So, the teaser helps us see that Captain America was a 10 year old boy scout who signs up for the Super Soldier program, gets put into a dutch oven/hotbox type coffin.....thing, and emerges as a large slab of beefcake supreme with a twist - he's still a vagina.
Y'know, thats some interesting technology the 40's had to offer the world. Amazing they couldn't use that tech to just, oh I don't know, STOP THE HOLOCOST FROM HAPPENING! Seriously, while thousands of Jews are burning and suffering in concentration camps, the American brass is spending taxpayers dollars trying to transform a scrawny white kid into a hunked out toe-head who prances around forests in a bright costume carrying an EXtremely subtle shield (**coff coff** sarcasm **coff coff**), which is I'm guessing a metaphore for how completely sassafrassed this guy is. Honestly, what kind of superhero hides behind a shield? And why wouldn't any bad guy shoot him in the legs or top of the head or something?

Wow this is easy to rip apart.

Anyway, the only redeeming quality about this movie is the fact that Hugo Weaving (Lord Elrond of Rivendell, and Mr. Smith of the Matrix) is playing Red Skull. But having him (a great actor) play in such a crappy movie is like.....well, that would be like giving a brand new car to a retarded person who will never be capable of even having a license ever - a complete waste of time. Meaning, its a waste of talent, essentially. But that has never happened to my recollection...recently...within a few years...........What I'm saying is that that redeeming quality is basically cancelled out.

Nothing about this movie looks interesting. Period. Oh, but Jesus I can't wait to see it, just so I can be entertained by the craptasticity (its gonna catch on!) of it. But I will not PAY to have my brain stirred by a stupid spoon.

But no matter what I say the idiots of the world will flock to partake in the mass disappointment that will come moments after leaving the theater. Essentially thats what it boils down to. Paramount and Marvel spent millions to make a 2 hour crapfest, and the zombies of America will eat it up like a freshly cracked open brain.

Ah, well, its nice to be right. But if just the trailer for this movie gets me THIS huffy about it, imagine what the final product will do to all the like-minded ones out there. Well, nobody can say we didn't warn them.

Catch Captain America (for free when you download it from any pirated movie website) this summer.

Consider yourself informed.

-Lee

Oh BOY!

I really hope everyone in the world watches the superbowl today. Mainly cause the Captain America trailer will be shown during the 2nd half.
Oh, man, I cant wait.
I feel like....this:



Facepalm. That pretty much sums it up.
Enjoy the game. Steelers 17-9.

-Lee

Oh Boy, The Horrible Begins

Ok, so I was surfing the interwebs, trying to avoid the words "Twilight" and "Justin Bieber" (harder than first anticipated, btw), when I stumbled across a new pic from the upcoming Captain America movie. Behold:




At first glance this may appear to be pretty cool, but I assure you it is not. Let me enlighten you as we break this down piece by piece, shall we?

To begin, Captain America is a superhero, obviously. He is a symbol of justice and freedom and should be easily recognizable as such. But even in the 40's the Army was still concerned with camoflouge. This is where Cap has some issues. I'll get to his colors in a sec, but I wanna point out a pretty big flaw in his costume. If I were a Nazi sniper who was tasked with taking out Captain Caveman, the very symbol of everything I hated, I would want to aim right for his big, dumb head and bury a bullet right between his eyes. Well guess what? The Americans gave Cap a big, white, capitol "A" bullseye right in the middle of his blue forehead. How convenient! Seriously, a shot like that would be easier than shooting a SeaWorld dolphin with an RPG from the front row; and score an extra 500 XP for taking out a trainer or two. Mix in some tuna and mayo and we can all have sandwiches for lunch. Yum. Now im hungry. **goes and makes a tuna samwich**

Where was I? Oh yes: Cap's a dork. Honestly, who wears red, white, and blue in a combat setting? I understand he isn't called "Captain Camo" or "Captain RealTree," but come ON, its the NAZIS we're talking about! They kinda weren't known for thier habits of NOT shooting regular people, let alone some bozo wearing clown shoes.

And the star on his chest bothers me too. I know its supposed to harken back to the original costume, but come ON! Gah, this is more of a pet peeve, so I digress.

But, why does his "helmet" go all the way down to his eyes? Is it to mask who he is? I mean, its silly enough that its bright blue; it really just enhances the dorkiness even more. I mean, would YOU follow that guy into combat? Or would you let him do his own thing far away from you? Yeah, me too. The "A" must stand for "A-- hat" as well as "America."

To be completely honest, this whole get up looks too modern to be from the 40's. I'm not sure if this is a later costume in the film or the ONLY one, but it looks a tad too "hey lets add some straps for no reason" to me. Even if it is a costume for modern times, its still too "disco fever" to pass as a government issue super suit (Frozone: "Where is my SUPA' SUIT?!")

The actor playing Cap doesn't look like he's even INTO the role at all really. In the above picture he has a kindof "I really hope the camera is getting my profile from a great angle; I really want this cosmetically enhanced chin to get an Academy Award this time around" look on his face. Ok, ok, Lucas Lee (Scott Pilgrim joke, ha!), we get it: you play douches in all your movies. Take five, and we'll resume your career in about ten years after Captain America/The Avengers ruins it. **sigh** Moving on.

As I said in the Green Lantern review, this is all subject to change. The movie may come out and be awesome, but I'm just going by what Marvel is giving me right now. If the trailer looks even remotely cool I'll change my opinion to an "undecided" instead of "pass go, do not collect $100." Marvel is hit and miss anyway, I mean, who ACTually liked the Edward Norton version of Hulk? Wait, back up, let me clarify: Ed Norton as Bruce Banner? Absolutely. If it was a Bruce Banner movie alone with hardly or no Hulk at all I'd have been happy. But strangely enough that movie had too much Hulk, and at the same time almost not enough. Anyway, before I start reviewing Hulk, I'll switch back to Captain Crunch.

Bruce Banner was a mild mannered scientist when a freak accident in the lab changed him into...........crap! Sorry.

I know he was the first Avenger (I say "was" cause Cap's dead in the comics...spoiler alert...), and that Marvel is planning an Avengers movie soon, but Captain Ameridouche is just a character that is better left on the pages of the comics in my opinion. To make a movie about him is to pillage something already in its purest form, exploiting its usefulness, and perverting a source of strength that a nation can draw upon in times of despair, when it feels like its reserves are low.

Or so some nerds may feel.

Gear up to have your minds erased by stupidness and not care as it happens this summer when "Captain America: The First Avenger" hits theaters.

Some Green Lantern Costume Rejects:

I think they went with that last one, I'm pretty sure...

You - Obey The FIST!

Ok, well, based upon the feedback I'm getting regarding the previous post about Green Lantern, I guess I should go ahead and give a full pre-release review of the said movie. This is just what I and a few close friends have surmised about this movie based on (A. Our knowledge of Green Lantern comics, and (B. The official trailers, and (C. How we feel about the actors/actresses. Ok, read on, you Klingon:

Ok, so right off the bat I'm seeing a problem with this movie. In the comics, Hal Jordan was a respectable man, but the opening part of the trailer shows him being exceptionally unhospitable to his "lady friend" from the night before, whom he obviously has no intention of keeping, seeing as how Blake Lively is supposed to be his love interest in the film. How shallow.
Speaking of Ms. Lively, she is WAAY hot. Just saying. Moving on.
The alien who gives Hal the ring, Abin Sur, tells him to "protect our universe." What bugs me about this is that Superman is kinda already on that job, right? Like, I know he's mainly involved in protecting the earth, but he fights baddies in space too. And Supe's is like the Boss in the DC universe. That automatically renders Green Lantern invalid. This movie is losing.
The visuals in this movie are really good, I mean, everything looks pretty cool. But I expect that because CGI has been a part of movies for so long now that saying "well the graphics are good" is like saying "well boats float pretty good in water." Its just something you expect and have come to rely on.

That having been said, I have to comment about the costume: Its gay looking. It looks like he was painted in different shades of green then dusted with green glitter. Its laziness really. A real costume probably looked hokey on screen, so the art director probably just said "eff it - just put him in a green unitard and we'll make it digital." Batman has a real costume. Superman had a real costume too. Even the Marvel characters here of late have real costumes (i.e. Spiderman, X-Men, Iron Man....wait, scratch that last one...) It just seems lazy to me is all.
Now I could be totally wrong here. The movie could come out and totally blow my mind. But I'm not expecting anything fantastic about Mr. Lantern, especially since they have funnyman Ryan Reynolds starring. Yeah, THAT Ryan Reynolds, the one who ruined Deadpool. Dont even get me started on that one.

Anywho, thats my pre-release review of it all, which is subject to change. Look for my official review of Green Lantern sometime after its official release, or sometime after I feel like it.
If you really want a good one, just wait til I review the Captain America movie. Oh Holy Lord, that movie is going to be such a steamy pile. I cannot even wait for an official trailer. You just wait.
Til then, this has been an entry.

-Lee

One Day, Ill Live On The Moon...

Hey, I just want to check in and make sure this thing still works. Dont get your feathers ruffled, I dont have anuthing interesting to post, not yet anyway.
Except that I think the Green Lantern movie looks like its gonna suck, mainly cause I personally dont care about it. But, if Hal Jordan ends up actually using the ring to make a giant fist to pound someone into the ground, I will be surprised and retract my earlier comment. Otherwise, Green Lantern is a joke.
Basically thats all. Hope this wasnt as big a waste of time as it was mine.

-Lee